Oceanside, CA- Some people will resort to anything to avoid a big divorce pay out and retain custody of their children, though it is unthinkable for most, murder is the option some people choose. Earlier this week the self-professed Christian lead singer of the rock band As I Lay Dying was arrested for plotting the murder of his estranged wife Meggan Lambesis.

Tim Lambesis, 32, was picked up by police while on a shopping trip in Oceanside, California after he allegedly solicited a hit man to kill his wife, ABC News reported. That hit man was an undercover detective, who approached Lambesis, after he attempted to hire another individual last week.

Jan Caldwell, a spokeswoman for the San Diego sheriff’s department told ABC News, “Information came to us last Thursday; we decide to initiate an investigation immediately.”

Apparently, San Diego police received a tip on May 2nd that alerted them of the plot. Tim Lambesis, who is the front man for a Grammy-nominated Christian heavy metal band As I lay Dying, was served with divorce papers in September of last year and thought a murder-for-hire plot was the solution to his contentious divorce.

Lambesis is now facing three federal charges, including one count for solicitation to commit murder and two counts of conspiracy to commit a crime.

In her divorce documents, which were obtained by the Associated Press, Meggan Lambesis detailed her concerns over her husband’s changing behavior and questioned whether he was capable of caring for the their three adopted children.

The AP documents stated that Tim was often distracted when with the young children ages 4, 8 and 10, spending a great deal of time on the phone talking and texting and falling asleep while in charge of watching them.

She also said that her husband tours six months out the year and has traveled across the country twice to visit a girlfriend. She also complained that he has become “obsessed” with bodybuilding and has spent thousands of dollars on tattoos.

Megan and Tim agreed to mediation to determine child custody but those talks must not be working. As any previously divorce couple knows, a contentious custody battle can make anyone feel angry and out of control.

It is very shocking and sad, but it is not unusual for one spouse to plot the murder of the other when a marriage breaks down. According to the National Institutes of Health, two-thirds of all women who are murdered are killed by their spouse, but women too plot to murder their spouses. Each year, several thousand marriages are ended by homicide rather than through the court system; it’s such an unfortunate and common fact that the first suspect in any murder case is generally a spouse or family member.

There are better ways of dealing with this than a murder plot like hiring an attorney familiar with child custody laws. They can help temper an estranged spouse’s emotions and assure their client gets a custody arrangement that protects the interest of their child or children.