JewelFt. Lauderdale, FL- There are some celebrity couples no one would be surprised to find their marriage is over (think Kim Kardashian and Kanye West), and there are other celebrity splits that take everyone by surprise. Such is the case of singer-songwriter Jewel who announced she and Ty Murray, her partner of 16 years would be divorcing.

Jewel decided to get ahead of the media and make announcement about the divorce directly to her fans via her website. In her heartfelt announcement, Jewel writes, “Ty and I have always tried to live the most authentic life possible, and we wanted our separation as husband and wife to be nothing less loving than the way we came together.”

Jewel assured her fans that her spilt with Murray, a rodeo cowboy, is “difficult” but a “thoughtful and tender undoing of ourselves.” She wrote, “We both value growth. And growth became tragically and undeniably stifled as a couple, and we believe we can find it again in setting each other free.”

Jewel and Murray began their relationship 16 years ago, but didn’t tie the knot until 2008. They had a son, Kase, in 2011 who the couple plans to parent together.

In a joint statement Jewel and Murray said, “Our dedication to our son is unwavering and we are both committed to being the best partners in raising our son.”

Jewel said she and Murray have no “desire to damage ourselves and each other in the process” so it is unlikely they will be entangled in an ugly fight over assets and child custody.

Between Jewel’s “tender undoing” and Gwenyth Paltrow’s “conscious uncoupling” celebrities are using their position and fame to alleviate some of the stigma’s attached to divorce. While divorce is not as common as previously thought- recent studies show the divorce rate is more in the 30 percent range than the 50 percent range—there is still a great deal of negative stigma attached to the act of untangling a marriage, especially when the divorcing couple has children.

It is true that divorce has numerous physical and emotional effects on any children a couple has, but there are ways to transition to a single life with as little pain as possible. Some couples are able to severe their relationship without acrimony and can easily decide how to handle custody issues in as peaceable manner as possible.

However not all couples are as fortunate or able to put aside their differences for the sake of their children. Settling contentious issues are often best left to divorce attorneys who understand how family courts work and can give their clients sound advice on how to settle the more disagreeable aspects of divorce without it turning into a war.

Consulting a divorce lawyer early on the process will give an estranged couple the tools and knowledge they need to end their marriage with as little fighting as possible. A family law expert won’t take your emotional pain away, but they can make pragmatic aspects of divorce less painful.