Have you been fighting with your spouse a lot lately? Shockingly, this may not be an indication that your marriage is on the road to divorce. Recent research has found that big fights or high conflict periods led to divorce in only 9 percent of marriages. Couples who argued regularly were more likely to be communicating effectively and setting limits in their relationships, while lack of conflict may be a sign that one or both of the spouses have stepped out on the relationship. So, how can you tell if you’re just going through a tough time, or whether it’s time to call a family law attorney like Davey Jones? Here are five shocking signs that your marriage may be in trouble.
- Comparing yourself to happier couples. Psychologically, we compare ourselves to other people when we aren’t happy. If you find yourself comparing your relationship to those of others, your marriage may be on the rocks. Social media comparisons can be just as dangerous as the ones you make with couples you regularly interact with.
- You feel more comfortable speaking to your friends than you do speaking to your spouse. Not speaking regularly to your spouse may be a sign that communication isn’t as strong as it should be. You may be drifting apart or placing more importance on other relationships in your life. The Huffington Post reports that this can manifest itself in many ways. Some people avoid being home with their partner or make after-work plans regularly, rather than spending time with their spouse. If you find that you and your partner aren’t sharing things in the way you once did, it may be time to make some plans to reconnect.
- You feel nothing. If you’re angry, it likely means that you still have some investment in the relationship. Anger often masks underlying hurt. If you feel nothing—not anger, not joy, this may be a sign of a deeper issue.
- You fantasize about divorce. It’s normal to imagine what it would be like to be single from time to time. And, yes, it’s common to fantasize about escaping to the Bahamas with Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie every now and then—especially when your spouse forgot to take out the trash—again. But if you find yourself regularly imagining and dreaming about a single life without a partner, you may be already half-way out the door.
- You realize something needs to change. People divorce for many reasons. Maybe you’ve been tolerating emotional abuse for years. Maybe you have asked for consideration and haven’t received it. Whatever your reason, we all have our limits. If you have specific concerns you can pinpoint, you may want to consider couples therapy. If the changes you ask for don’t happen, it may be time to move on.
Ending a marriage can be one of the most difficult things you’ll do. The good news is that a fight now and then, and the stray fantasy doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s time to call the family lawyer in Alexandria, LA just yet. Many marriages can be saved with effort, additional work, or just the acknowledgement that something isn’t as it should be.
Davey Jones with the Jones Law Firm has years of experience and can help you navigate the divorce process. Visit his website at www.hdjoneslaw.com today.